The Dance of Communication


A Community Exploration of Compassion

April 26-28, 2018

Ashland, Oregon USA

Come to my free workshop on Friday, April 27, 

1:30-3:00pm at the Ashland Public Library

"How to Keep Your Cool When You're Mad as Hell"



Selene Aitken demonstrates how to focus a group on what Really Matters ("Needs".) She leads an exercise that raises awareness of the effects of judgment, blame and labeling. These tools, principles and relationship skills facitate interactions in all types of cultures and circumstances.

The Dance of Communication



Nonviolent Communication

Also known as Compassionate Communication, NVC, creates a climate of collaboration in which participants, hold each other's needs with care.



Restoring Kinship

This special program integrates NVC and current research and protocols for bringing parents and their adult sons and daughters into greater harmony.

 NVC Training workshop, Kabul, August 2007

NVC Training workshop, Kabul, August 2007


What NVC brings to mediation is a focus on the "Needs," ie deep values of all parties. My requirement before we start is clarity that our goal is reconciliation. 


Selene Aitken


In the early 90's, I came to Nonviolent Communication with a background in teaching, mediation, foreign languages, and peace and justice activism.

NVC changed my life. I have gained a sustaining confidence that I can bridge differences and conflicts with compassion. My relationship with myself is now more often characterized by joy, peace and acceptance than by self-criticism.

Most important to me is that NVC continuously gives me hope that the caring world I want to live in is possible.

 My NVC work in places like Kabul, El Salvador, Syria and Buenos Aires as well as the US has confirmed for me the universal application of NVC principles and practices.

I see myself as a resource to explore issues of reactivity, awareness and communication. Whether I’m teaching a workshop, consulting with a professional group, mediating a conflict in a non-profit organization or coaching a couple in private sessions, I enjoy the process of untangling misunderstandings to transform them into collaborative and satisfying relationships.


Services & Prices

Nonviolent Communication®

I teach an interpersonal process called Nonviolent Communication® to groups of private individuals, to businesses and organizations.

Contact me for more information.

Weekend Workshops on site

Clear, Calm and Courageous”

  Offered yearly

 A multi-level experience of diving deep into learning the tools and living the principles of Nonviolent Communication® $100

Ongoing Groups

On site and/or on line and offered occasionally. Some examples of groups are:

  • NVC for Women’s Empowerment.

  • Compassion Cafe -  Practice giving and receiving empathy.

  • Practice NVC Skills.

  • Conflict Improv -  Bring your challenging situation to the group and gain support to transform it. Learn through play.

  • Study the 17 Core Commitments developed by Miki Kashtan. 

 Individual Coaching $75/hour

  • On site or by phone or videoconference.

  • Practice before difficult conversations.

  • Re-visit past interactions to derive understanding, learning and support. 

Train-the-Trainer $50/hour

  • On site or by phone or videoconference.

  • Take advantage of my life-long experience in teaching.

  • Enjoy tips on teaching NVC.

  • Receive support for unexpected challenges in the journey of receiving NVC certification.

Speaking Engagements

I present on a variety of topics to school groups, organizations, private groups and classes. Some topics I address are:

  • Nonviolence in everyday life.

  • Reconciliation between parents and adult sons and daughters.

  • The NVC Way of leadership and empowerment for women and girls.

I adapt my material to the personality and interests of the group. With humor and gentle engagement, topics come to life. Fees vary.


Contact Me


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